oh my goodness... im dead tired... can somebody teach me a new word....? for a freaking "tired"

been living these days like hell.. tempers are uncontrollable.. i can hardly calm down.. i can hardly be optimistic.. am i beyond optimum? that the results turned upside down.. with pain inside out... looking solemn, or rather fierce and unhappy the past days (or even weeks).. the reason is solely exhaustion...

am i too stressed out? unable to put things aside and do things one step at a time.. ms wan told me im a great observer.. but am i aware of myself at all? am i concerned about myself? or am i overly concerned about myself? im love looking things from another angle and notice different things from people that will normally miss out unintentionally.. but have i fail to look at my own self? have i forgotten to place a mirror in front (not literally of cuz) of me? when i sit down and think, reflect about my actions, i can feel problems growing bigger, huge mass of stress crashing down to earth.. and i the only one who "shoulders" it.. its hard to treat the "crashing stress" like a blanket and put over me.. i can hardly lift it up, to even catch my own breath.. how do you expect me to bring it over me..

good news? im proud to announce that my dearest senior, DAPHNE JANSZ, top the eurasian list in SINGAPORE for O' Levels!!! she scored 6 A1s, 1 A2, and 1 B3.. coach said that daphne didnt do well in PRI sch and still manage to get 6 points (miraculous!!!) and she urged us to work hard, believing in us that we can make it... so netballers?! go for it!!!